Welcome to the Grind

So, I’m just gonna shoot this straight out there.

I DON’T LIKE MY JOB.

I don’t feel too superior for the job. I don’t think I’m not getting paid enough for the job, but there is something missing. There is no…. It has no… It’s boring! Not just regular boring, It’s uber boring; super boring, annoyingly tentative, exhaustingly dry, make-you-wanna-light-yourself-on-fire DULL.

I suppose I should quit but then I’d be a quitter, and I don’t like quitters. In fact no-one does. We, and by we, I mean human beings and movie-goers, are genetically programmed to like those who triumph against all odds, defeat their foes and achieve all manners of glory, traditionally after some tragic twist about an hour in.

But then again, if I dont quit I’ll probably be miserable. I can’t do miserable. My whole identity is created on the sole idea that I am positive, lucky and generally happy. In addition to this I’m not sure quitting would make me happy. Unemployment means moneyless which very quickly moves into bored and presumably miserable. So there’s something to be thankful for. Capital reward to drown out the dying whimpers of dreams once held.

Of, course, I’m being dramatic. Very, in fact. I’m bringing levels of drama, the likes of which broadway has never seen. This is all due to the fact that London adventures await me soon and all that stands between me and the big smoke is four more weeks of meaningless, average and mundane.

OK, so rant over. Feel free to find laughter from my nonsensical ramblings. All I hope for is that this isn’t used as evidence for the prosecution or read by anyone I work with. I’d probably get fired, and I have all my ‘baby-mommas’ to pay. Well not yet, but according to the internal profile I’ve constructed of my race and gender, based on american chat shows… it’s only a matter of time.

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Lez Zups

I like puzzles.

Puzzles add spice. They make life interesting.

Puzzles are your mind’s momentary dip of it’s toe into a pool of megalomania.

They are this:

Where is Roy Walker when you need him?

Did you get it? I hope so. It’s relatively easy. Did you get that glimpse of electricity when the idea clicked. For that split second you were a genius and a god with no equal. Did you blurt out ‘Ha” or intend to but the word didn’t quite percolate in time? It’s a wonderful feeling.

Here, today, on this green Earth, I hope you remember that ‘Ha’. I hope you remember the thrill you got from figuring that out, accepting the challenge and seek out questions for your mind to solve. Personally I find people are often a good place start, particularly when it comes to irrationality. Figure out why people walk on paths instead of the quicker route across the grass, why ask how you are even while they are clearly uninterested. Whatever your particular taste in puzzles, engage them and let them power and entertain you. Remember you’re not making problems, you’re finding solutions.

Feel free to start with this anagram. If you get this, you have earned yourself a massive cookie.

HA HA! VIPEROUS COMMITTEE